“- Tom: Are you going to tell me what really happened with Peter?
- Sarah: Are you going to tell me what really happened with red bra?
- Tom: Nothing happened.
- Sarah: I hope you used a condom.
- Tom: I hope Peter used a condom.
- Sarah: I'm sorry, they don't make condoms that big.”
Ashton Kutcher - Tom
Brittany Murphy - Sarah

- Shazzer: Oh, God! You didn't use those? The vegancondoms?
- Bridget Jones: "Biodegradable and dolphin-friendly". If I'm going to be slutty, it's nice to think I'm helping the environment.
Sally Phillips - Shazzer
Renee Zellweger - Bridget Jones

“- Pee Wee: It's too big.
- Tommy: Pee Wee, we don't have any training rubbers.
- Mickey: He needs the junior size.”

Dan Monahan - Pee Wee
Wyatt Knight - Tommy
Roger Wilson - Mickey

“- Maxie Devine: Where did you get that haircut? In the Army?
- Christopher Dubois: No, um... I'm a sailor.”
James Remar - Maxie Devine
Jean-Claude Van Damme - Christopher Dubois

“I wrote the book on sailing. In fact, I am the book on sailing.”
Sir Patrick Stewart - Adventure