Liz Hurley quotes
“I'd rather die than be as fat as Marilyn Monroe.”
“- Vanessa Kensington: What's your plan?
- Austin Powers: [nervously] First, I plan to soil myself. Then I'm going to regroup and come up with a new plan. Any thoughts?”
“It's not easy being the Barbra Streisand of Evil.”
“- Elliot Richards: You can't read that, that's private stuff!
- The Devil: You're telling me, listen to this. Last night was the most incredible night of my life. I never did get any of the guys' names, but I brought them back home and all five of them banged me like a Salvation Army drum.
- Elliot Richards: What?
- The Devil: Kidding.”
“Seven utterly fabulous wishes for one piddling, little soul?”
“- Elliot Richards: No! That's not fair.
- The Devil: Fair? Who do you think you're talking to? I don't recall anybody ever accusing me of being fair before. I think I'm insulted.”
“- The Devil: You know, you'd think that meeting the Devil would be interesting enough but no. All people want to know about is Him. Like He's so bloody fascinating!
- Elliot Richards: So He's a man?
- The Devil: Yeah, most men think they're God, this one just happens to be right.”
“I love to see other women in pink. It's good for every shade of skin and hair.”
“- Elliot Richards: I, Elliot Richards, hereafter known as the Damned - the Damned?
- The Devil: How about the Darned, sound better?”
“- Vanessa Kensington: Always wanting to have fun, Austin. That's you in a nutshell!
- Austin Powers: No, this is me in a nutshell. [acts as if he were in a nutshell] Help! I'm in a nutshell! How did I get into this nutshell? Look at the size of this bloody great big nutshell! What sort of shell has a nut like this? This is crazy!”
“- Austin Powers: Only sailors use condoms, baby.
- Vanessa Kensington: Not in the 90's, Austin.
- Austin Powers: Well they should, those filthy beggars. They go from port to port.”
“- Elliot Richards: But it's my soul! I can't give you my soul.
- The Devil: What are you, James Brown?”
“- Elliot Richards: Maybe I should call you a cab... Although it's gonna be hard to find one that'll go to Hell this time of night!
- The Devil: Oh. What a delightfully piquant wit.”
“- Vanessa Kensington: Do you smoke after sex?
- Austin: I don't know, baby, I never looked.”
“- Vanessa Kensington: Mr. Powers, I would never have sex with you, ever! If you were the last man on earth and I was the last woman on earth, and the future of the human race depended on our having sex, simply for procreation, I still would not have sex with you.
- Austin Powers: What's your point, Vanessa?”
“I'm not all peaches and cream, you know. I do have a darker side, and believe me, it's not pretty.”
“My life is a living hell!”
“- Elliot Richards: Oh, wait! I wish I were the most emotionally sensitive man in the world.
- The Devil: Damn. I was hoping you wouldn't catch that. I could've had a lot of fun with that one.”
“I wasn't kidding when I said I liked you. I do Elliot. I think you have massive potential. If you're looking at an eternity in hell, let me tell you, it wouldn't hurt to have a friend like me.”