Mike Myers quotes
“- Ray Foster: Bohemian...
- Brian May: Rhapsody. It's poetic.
- Ray Foster: What on earth is it about? Scaramouche? Galileo? Beelzebub? And that Ismallah business?
- Freddie Mercury: Bismillah.”
- Dr. Evil: Mr. President, after I destroy Washington D.C. I will destroy another major city every hour on the hour. That is, unless, of course, you pay me one hundred billion dollars.
- The President: Dr. Evil, this is 1969! That amount of money doesn't even exist. That's like saying, "I want a kajillion bajillion dollars".
“- Vanessa Kensington: What's your plan?
- Austin Powers: [nervously] First, I plan to soil myself. Then I'm going to regroup and come up with a new plan. Any thoughts?”
“Donkey, two things okay? Shut... up!”
“- Felicity Shagwell: I want to see what happens in the 70s and 80s.
- Austin: The 70s and the 80s? You're not missing anything, believe me. I've looked into it. There's a gas shortage and A Flock of Seagulls. That's about it.”
“I'd hoped Scott would look up to me, run the business of the family, head an evil empire just like his dear old dad, give him my love and the things I never had. Scott would think I was a cool guy, return the love I have, make me want to cry, be evil, but have my feelings too, change my life with Oprah and Maya Angelou. But Scott rejected me,...” (continue)(continue reading)
- Benjamin Oliver: Oh, actually all champagne is French; it's named after the region. Otherwise it's sparkling white wine. Americans of course don't recognize the convention, so it becomes that thing of calling all of their sparkling white "Champagne", even though by definition they're not.
- Wayne Campbell: Ah yes, it's a lot like "Star Trek:... (continue)(continue reading)
“- Wayne Campbell: She's a babe.
- Garth Algar: She's magically babelicious.
- Wayne Campbell: She tested very high on the stroke-ability scale.”
“- Shrek: I can't believe I'm going to be a father. How did this happened?
- Puss in Boots: Allow me to explain. When a man falls in love with a woman, he is overcome with powerful urges...”
“That's my princess! Go find your own!”
“- Lord Farquaad: What's that? It's hideous!
- Shrek: Well, that's not very nice. It's just a donkey.”
- Scott: If you've got a time machine, why don't you just go back and kill Austin Powers when he's sitting on the crapper or something?
- Dr. Evil: How about... "no", Scott? Okay?
“- Wayne Campbell: I smell bacon. Does anyone else smell bacon?
- Garth Algar: I definitely smell a pork product of some kind.”
“Are those sharks with laser beams attached to their heads?
[Scott Evil nods]”
“- Donkey: I have a bit of a confession to make: donkeys don't have layers. We wear our fear right there on our sleeves.
- Shrek: Wait a second, donkeys don't have sleeves!”
“You're semi-evil. You're quasi-evil. You're the margarine of evil. You're the Diet Coke of evil. Just one calorie, not evil enough.”
“- The Cat: There is a third option.
- Sally: There is?
- The Cat: Yes. It involves murder.”