“- Lord Arthur Goring: Shouldn't you be in bed, Miss Mabel?
- Miss Mabel Chiltern: Lord Goring!
- Lord Arthur Goring: My father always tells me to go to bed, so I don't see why I shouldn't give you the same advice. I always pass on good advice. It is the only sensible thing to do with it.”
Rupert Everett - Lord Arthur Goring
Minnie Driver - Miss Mabel Chiltern

“- Buddy: What's it like?
- Santa: Well, there are some things you should know. First off, you see gum on the street, leave it there. It isn't free candy.”

Will Ferrell - Buddy
Ed Asner - Santa

“And what did I tell you about this!? This will go straight to your ass!”

Rob Schneider - Jessica

“A little word of advice, my friend. Sometimes you gotta let those hard-to-reach chips go.”

Brian O'Halloran - Dante Hicks

“I can't sleep. I need Nana's cookies. I'm gonna turn a personal addiction into a positive cinematic moment.”

Olivia DeJonge - Becca