“No one laughs at a master of Quack Fu!”
Chip Zien - Howard T. Duck

- Chris 'Oz' Ostreicher: Friends call me "Nova" as in Casanova.
- College Girl: That's pathetic!
- Chris 'Oz' Ostreicher: Jeez you don't have to laugh at me.
Chris Klein - Chris 'Oz' Ostreicher
Tara Subkoff - College Girl

“- Peggy Ann Snow: Were you laughing every second?
- Corky: Peg, I...
- Peggy Ann Snow: Was I funny, you bastard son-of-a-bitch?”
Ann-Margret - Peggy Ann Snow
Philip Anthony Hopkins - Corky

“- Marquis Robert de la Cheyniest: Corneille! Put an end to this farce!
- Corneille, le majordome: Which one, Your Lordship?”
Marcel Dalio - Marquis Robert de la Cheyniest
Eddy Debray - Corneille, le majordome

“- Clifford Muckle - Boy in Bank: Mommy, doesn't that man have a funny nose?
- Mrs. Muckle - Mother in Bank: You mustn't make fun of the gentleman, Clifford. You'd like to have a nose like that full of nickels, wouldn't you?”

Bobby Larson - Clifford Muckle - Boy in Bank
Jan Duggan - Mrs. Muckle - Mother in Bank