“- Ray: So you've used the door, the building's still intact, people are happy you've arrived, they feel safe now, there's an officer there and he's done a good job, so you might want to tell him he's done a good job.
- John Hancock: What the hell did I have to come for, Ray, if he's done a good job?”

Jason Bateman - Ray
Will Smith - John Hancock

“- Cop: A-ha! Plumbers!
- Luigi: No, he is! I'm just apprenticing!
- Cop: Get in the car!
- Luigi: But I didn't do nothin'!
- Cop: Get in the car now!
- Mario: Are you tellin' us that you can arrest a guy for being a plumber?”

John Leguizamo - Luigi Mario
Bob Hoskins - Mario Mario

“There's about as much chance of me getting behind a desk as there is of me getting a new girlfriend.”
Warren Beatty - Dick Tracy

“- Juan Seguin: They are gonna want you humble, General.
- Sam Houston: I humble myself before God and there the list ends.”

Jordi Mollà - Juan Seguin
Dennis Quaid - Sam Houston

“Outraging a lady's modesty, very serious crime in Singapore.”

Kay Siu Lim - Policeman