“The world is full of shit indeed.”
Thomas Jay Ryan - Henry Fool

“- Old Woman on Plane and Bus: I'm sorry. You have to speak up, son. I have this ringing in my ears. My doctor says it could be related to my heart palpitations.
- Beavis: Really? I poop too much.
- Old Woman on Plane and Bus: Maybe you're lactose intolerant.
- Beavis: I mean... No, no. I poop too much! And then I get tired.”
Cloris Leachman - Old Woman on Plane and Bus
Mike Judge - Beavis

“I'll probably shit blood tonight.”

Kevin Spacey - Verbal

Bear and a rabbit were taking a shit in the woods. And the bear turns to the rabbit and says, "Excuse me, do you have problems with shit sticking to your fur?". And the rabbit says, "No". So the bear wiped his ass with the rabbit.
Eddie Murphy - Eddie Murphy

My mother ran in the bathroom, see my big brother sitting in the bathroom with a piece of shit in his hand in the tub, I was laying in the bottom of the water with blood gushing out my eye, G.I. Joe up my ass. My mother's like, "What the fuck going on in here?".
Eddie Murphy - Eddie Murphy