“- David Starsky: It's 10 o'clock, you're late, I've been here since 8.
- Ken Hutchinson: 8 o'clock? I didn't even know this place opened at 8.”
Ben Stiller - David Starsky
Owen Wilson - Ken Hutchinson

“- Doralee Rhodes: You know... I just don't get it, Dwayne.
- Dwayne Rhodes: What's that, honey?
- Doralee Rhodes: I'm as nice as I know how to be to every single person in that office. Everyone treats me like a... bastard at a family reunion.”
Dolly Parton - Doralee Rhodes
Jeffrey Douglas Thomas - Dwayne Rhodes

“I've got a gun out there in my purse. Up until now I've been forgiving and forgetting because of the way I was brought up, but I'll tell you one thing: if you ever say another word about me or make another indecentproposal, I'm gonna get that gun of mine, and I'm gonna change you from a rooster to a hen with one shot!”

Dolly Parton - Doralee Rhodes

“- Franklin M. Hart Jr.: Mrs. Rhodes... I am a married man.
- Doralee Rhodes: Forget about your wife! I mean, you may be hers in the evening, but you're my boy from 9 to 5!”

Dabney Coleman - Franklin M. Hart Jr.
Dolly Parton - Doralee Rhodes

“Fuckin' office job! Who the fuck wants a job like that? You fuckin' sit at a little desk, you got your little phone, you got your little fuckin' piece of paper, your little pen, you write shit down, blah blah blah. Fuck, a monkey could do that shit man!”
Charlize Theron - Aileen