“- Billy Madison: Man, why did I have so many drinks? I can't remember! What's today?
- Frank: October?
- Billy Madison: It's Nudie Magazine Day!!”
Adam Sandler - Billy Madison
Norm MacDonald - Frank

I am so tired by the way you people talk. You know, I mean, "one day at a time". What is that? I mean, like two, three days at a time is an option?
Sandra Bullock - Gwen Cummings

“- Angus: Do you know what today is?
- Pestario 'Pest' Vargas: The first day of the rest of our lives?
- Angus: No.
- Pestario 'Pest' Vargas: Sean Connery's birthday?”
Charles Hallahan - Angus
John Leguizamo - Pestario 'Pest' Vargas

“- Dante: Can you feel it?
- Randal: Feel what?
- Dante: Today is the first day of the rest of our lives.”
Brian O'Halloran - Dante
Jeff Anderson - Randal

“- Ed Furillo: He turned around and he left. He never bothered us again. Well, I took care of my mother and my sister from that day on. That's my best day.
- Phil Berquist: What was your worst day?
- Ed Furillo: Same day.”

Bruno Kirby - Ed Furillo
Daniel Stern - Phil Berquist