“- Cat Ballou: Mrs. Parker didn't introduce us, I'm Catherine Ballou.
- Jed: I'm drunk as a skunk.”
Jane Seymour Fonda - Cat Ballou
Dwayne Hickman - Jed

- Hades: So you took care of him? "Dead as a doornail", weren't those your exact words?
- Pain: This might be a different Hercules.
- Panic: Yeah! I mean, Hercules is a very popular name nowadays!
- Pain: Remember, like, a few years ago, every other boy was named Jason, and the girls were all named Brittany?

James Woods - Hades
Bobcat Goldthwait - Pain
Matt Frewer - Panic

“- Benjamin Franklin Gates: I leveled with you one hundred percent.
- Abigail Chase: Give me the Declaration, Mr. Brown.
- Benjamin Franklin Gates: OK, my name's not Brown. It's Gates. I leveled with you ninety-eight percent.”
Nicolas Cage - Benjamin Franklin Gates
Diane Kruger - Abigail Chase

“- Scam: What's your name?
- Obie: Obie. Obediah. It's in the Bible. What's yours?
- Scam: Scam. It's in the Bible too.”
Darius McCrary - Scam
Ricky Busker - Obie

“As I understand from your communication, Mr. Engle, you're on the brink of self-destruction. May I shake your hand? A brilliant idea! I speak as one who has destroyed himself a score of times.”

Thomas Mitchell - Gene Gibbons