“- Stuart Little: You know where we can find him? - Monty: You don't wanna find him. You don't want anything to do with him. Trust me. He'd eat you so fast, you'd be a pile of falcon poop before you could yell for help.”
Michael J. Fox - Stuart Little
Steve Zahn - Monty
“Your grandfather used to say that a bird which flies into your house is an angel. You must look upon his presence as a blessing.”
Ben Kingsley - Behrani
“Falcons are vicious. They grab you by the back of the neck and carry you so high you can't even see the ground, and then they drop you. And by the time you hit the pavement, they just drink what's left through a straw.”
Steve Zahn - Monty
“The head of the sexually aroused adult gobbler can change into a variety of shades of red, white and blue. It's a very patriotic bird.”
Chandler McIntyre - Naturalist
“- Anne Stewart: I don't believe that the Holy Spirit is a dove. - Nicholas Stewart: I don't believe that either. - Anne Stewart: Doves are anything but holy. - Nicholas Stewart: They poo on the window.”
Alakina Mann - Anne Stewart
James Bentley - Nicholas Stewart
“- Paulie: Hit the brakes, ugly. - Benny: That's cute. You train the bird to insult your customers? - Paulie: No, I could tell you're ugly all by myself.”
Jay Mohr - Paulie
Jay Mohr - Benny
