“- Danny Costanzo: What the hell are we doing in Key West?
- Ray Hughes: It's as far south as we can go without having to speak Spanish.”
Billy Crystal - Danny Costanzo
Gregory Hines - Ray Hughes

“If I cannot send your payment, how on earth do you expect to transport an entire castle across the sea? The number of stamps alone is mind boggling!”
Peter O'Toole - Peter Plunkett

“- Brucey Madison: You thinking about moving out here, Pop?
- Oscar Madison: To where? Santa Yosinta-Malienta-Poliguenta? I'm not gonna learn another language just to find my way home at night.”
Jonathan Silverman - Brucey Madison
Walter Matthau - Oscar Madison

“- Sallah: Indy, you have no time. If you still want the ark, it is being loaded onto a truck for Cairo.
- Indiana Jones: Truck? What truck?”
John Rhys-Davies - Sallah
Harrison Ford - Indiana Jones

“A teacher once told me I was a mistress of self-reinvention. I wasn't really sure what it meant at the time. But since moving here, I've come to understand it. Ardsley-on-Hudson is boring and routine. It's a fucking baby factory. I wanna start my life over again.”
Haley Bennett - Megan