“- Interviewer: Tell me. Joe or Joseph, why do you want to be a doctor?
- Joe Slovak: That's easy. I want to help people.
- Interviewer: Come one Joe, you can be honest with me. Why do you want to be a doctor?
- Joe Slovak: Well, uh, I want to make lots of money.”
Matthew Modine - Joe Slovak

“- Walker: Why do you wanna be a doctor anyhow?
- Chris Hammond: So I can help people.
- Walker: How? By keeping them alive today so you can prolong their misery until tomorrow?”
John Turturro - Walker
Rob McElhenney - Chris Hammond

“- Bugs Bunny: Is there anything we can get for you, old chap?
- Daffy Duck: Yes. Get me a proctologist, right away.”

Mel Blanc - Bugs Bunny
Mel Blanc - Daffy Duck

“Our job is improving the quality of life, not just delaying death.”

Robin Williams - Patch Adams

“- Dr. Max Hart: This girl is dying; I have to open her trachea, for god's sake.
- Loomis: She will stabilize.
- Dr. Max Hart: She's dying.”
Max Robinson - Dr. Max Hart
Donald Pleasence - Loomis