“- Lenny: I didn't know you were color blind, Max.
- Max: It was the only way I could stand your ties.”
Ralph Fiennes - Lenny Nero
Tom Sizemore - Max Peltier

“- Mr. Chow: On 3 cut the grey wire.
- Stu: Wait! Wait! Wait! I don't have grey wire, I have red, green and yellow.
- Mr. Chow: That's weird, I have light grey, medium grey and dark grey.
- Stu: You do?
- Mr. Chow: Motherfucker! My bad, I am color blind.”
Ken Jeong - Mr. Chow
Ed Helms - Stu

“- Rick Leland: You certainly are a girl of many colors. First, your legs get blue. Then, your face turns green. And, now, your red all over.
- Alberta Marlow: I never knew what suffering was until I came on this pleasure trip.”
Humphrey Bogart - Rick Leland
Mary Astor - Alberta Marlow

“- Zack: Were all pink on the inside...
- Vince: Like vaginas.”
Dane Cook - Zack
Dax Shepard - Vince

“Maybe we could paint the house with vanishing cream. Then it would be invisible.”
Steve Viksten - Oskar Kokoshka