“- Larry: Iris, how old are you?
- Iris: Thirty.
- Larry: And you've had six husbands?
- Iris: That's a lot, isn't it?
- Larry: No, no, not really. When you think about it, it's just one every five years.”
Steve Martin - Larry
Judith Ivey - Iris

“Husband number six meet husband number four.”
Mae West - Marlo Manners

“I been savin' this money for a divorce, if ever I got a husband.”
Lillian Randolph - Annie

“When a woman unloads a husband, or a husband unloads a woman, however it happens, death, desertion, divorce - the three D’s, when that happens, a woman blooms. She blossoms. Like flowers. Like fruit. She is ripe.”
Jack Nicholson - Daryl Van Horne

“- Lauren: You know, I'm curious. With so many possible reasons, which one's the one your wife left you for?
- Jim: Cancer.
- Lauren: I'm sorry. I naturally just assumed you were divorced.
- Jim: It's okay. I naturally assumed your husband shot himself, so we're even.”
Drew Barrymore - Lauren
Adam Sandler - Jim