“- Lauren Hynde: Abstinence is 100% safe, which is less of a percentage than...
- Lara: Whatever, I don't care, I don't major in math.”
Shannyn Sossamon - Lauren Hynde
Jessica Biel - Lara

“- King Gustav: Really? That often? You must have collected several tails.
- Ralph: I admit I slept with a few. But I'm not like that anymore. Nowadays you can't be too careful. You don't know who they've been with.”

Julian Glover - King Gustav
John Goodman - Ralph

“See what happens when a boy and a girl don't know how to play it safe!”

Peter Frechette - DiMucci

“Condoms are in fashion again because of disease. Nowadays you have to boil people before you can sleep with them.”
John Travolta - Paul Brenner

“- George Banks: Drive carefully. And don't forget to fasten your condom.
- Annie Banks: Dad!
- George: Seat belt! I meant, I meant seat belt.”
Steve Martin - George Banks
Kimberly Williams-Paisley - Annie Banks