Parents quotes

“- Matilda: I have the adoption papers.
- Mrs. Wormwood: What? Where did you get those?
- Matilda: From a book in the library. I've had them since I was big enough to xerox.”
Mara Wilson - Matilda
Rhea Perlman - Mrs. Wormwood

“Parenting is an impossible job at any age.”
Harrison Ford

“The more I go through parenting, the more I say I owe my mother an apology.”
Ray Romano

“Everyone should have kids. They are the greatest joy in the world. But they are also terrorists. You'll realize this as soon as they are born, and they start using sleep deprivation to break you.”
Ray Romano

“Good evening. How's it going? Listen, girls... uh... as your father, I feel it incumbent upon me to set the record straight on the validity of the tale which Uncle Chet shared with us this evening. I know that a terrifying story like that coming from the mouth of a recognized authority figure could be traumatizing for kids like yourselves; I...” (continue)(continue reading)
Dan Aykroyd - Roman Craig

“Mr. Warbucks, when my folks left me at the orphanage ten years ago, they left a note saying they'd come back to get me as soon as they could, and they kept the other half of this old locket so I'd know them when they came.”
Aileen Quinn - Annie

“- Annie: Close your eyes. Think about your folks.
- Molly: You're the only one who really has folks. Mine are dead.
- Annie: Think about the folks who want to adopt you, because want a little girl with brown hair and brown eyes.”
Aileen Quinn - Annie
Toni Ann Gisondi - Molly

“- Sugar Ray: I'm gonna take this little boy home to his mother.
- Young Quick: My mama's dead.
- Sugar Ray: Well, your daddy?
- Young Quick: My father's dead, too.
- Sugar Ray: Did you kill them?
- Young Quick: No, they’re just dead.”
Richard Pryor - Sugar Ray
Desi Arnez Hines II - Young Quick

“There's one thing every little kid knows: Daddies mean fun; mommies mean business.”
Marcia Strassman - Diane

“Where are those little boogers? If I was a little booger, where would I be? Mom and Dad's room!”
Patrick Labyorteaux - Fester

“There's love for your parents, your family, your spouse, your partner, your friends, but the nature of the connection you have with your child, there's nothing like it. It has its own character and it's so serious and so powerful, and so it's a prism through which I see everything.”
Annette Bening

“As husband to my grandmother I am my own grandpa!”
Tom Arnold - Stanley Stupid

“Our son doesn't know who Boz Scaggs is. We have failed as parents.”

Bryan Cranston - Walter White

“- Sarbojaya Ray: You'll educate the boy, give him his sacred thread, teach him to worship the gods. Durga will find a good husband. Two meals a day, new clothes twice a year - what more could we want?
- Harihar Ray: We'll have all that and more. My ancestors were writers, after all. They left a legacy that can't be ignored. Just wait two years....” (continue)(continue reading)
Karuna Bannerjee - Sarbojaya Ray
Kanu Bannerjee - Harihar Ray

“Parenting is one of the hardest jobs on earth.”
Jennifer Aniston

“Great, I hijacked my fucking parents.”
Denis Colin Leary - Gus

“He's my son and I should be around him. I wasn't around my dad and look at the fuckin' way I turned out.”
Ryan Gosling - Luke

“Gatsby's real name was James Gatz. His parents were dirt-poor farmers from North Dakota, but he never accepted them as his parents at all. In his own imagination, he was a son of God, destined for future glory.”
Tobey Maguire - Nick Carraway

“Isn't that what's wrong with the world today? People are just looking for the easy way out, like their problems are gonna go away? Problems just don't go, Flo! You know? So the question here is: what are we going to do with our little problemchild? I'll tell you what we are going to do. Something that no parent has ever done for him before....” (continue)(continue reading)
John Ritter - Benjamin 'Ben' Healy, Jr.

“- Frank Adler: Look, just don't worry, okay?
- Roberta Taylor: Don't tell me that. There's nothing you can say that's gonna make me feel good because I have no say in any of this, Frank. I'm not a blood relative! I'm not a legal guardian! I'm nothing! Just a lady who lives next door whose opinions mean nothing, whose feelings mean nothing! Would...” (continue)(continue reading)

Chris Evans - Frank Adler
Octavia Spencer - Roberta Taylor

“- Nicole Burnell: You and mom have a lawyer?
- Sam Burnell: Well, yes. He's your lawyer, too.
- Nicole Burnell: My lawyer. Why do I need a lawyer?
- Mary: Well maybe we shouldn't be talking about this just now, with you barely home. Aren't you hungry, honey? You want me to fix you something?
- Nicole Burnell: No. What's this lawyer business?”
Sarah Polley - Nicole Burnell
Tom McCamus - Sam Burnell
Brooke Johnson - Mary

“If dad's a liberal Democrat, then you'd have to say mom is the one thing more extreme. She's a guilty liberal Democrat.”
Natasha Lyonne - DJ

“- Will Smith: What's your daughter's name?
- Ollie Trinke: Gertrude.
- Will Smith: Damn, why'd you do that man?”
Will Smith - Himself
Ben Affleck - Ollie Trinke

“- Peter: If you're not a father to me, how come you're a grandfather to Will?
- Sully: 'cause you gotta start someplace.”
Dylan Walsh - Peter
Paul Newman - Sully

I love you guys, don't get me wrong. But for the first time in my life I'm eighteen and I can say "fuck you".

Matthew Lillard - Stevo