“Doctor, I'm so unhappy. I'm a woman trapped inside a man's body - and you're not helping me to get out! So I got a new shrink, Levy's his name, he's gonna sign the papers so I can get my operation.”

William Finley - Bobbi

“- Francis: Why are you always on about women, Stan?
- Stan aka Loretta: I want to be one.
- Reg: What?
- Stan aka Loretta: I want to be a woman. From now on, I want you all to call me 'Loretta'.
- Reg: What?
- Stan aka Loretta: It's my right as a man.”
Michael Palin - Francis
Eric Idle - Stan aka Loretta
John Marwood Cleese - Reg

“- Georgie Weiss: Why would Lugosi wanna do a sex-change flick?
- Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Because he's my friend!”
Mike Starr - Georgie Weiss
Johnny Depp - Ed Wood

“- Walt Koontz: How can a man cut off his balls, how do you do that?
- Rusty: Because, I'm a woman trapped in a man's body.
- Walt Koontz: Eh, you're ain't no woman.
- Rusty: I'm just not your idea of a woman, Walt.
- Walt Koontz: You're nobody's idea of a woman.”
Robert De Niro - Walt Koontz
Philip Seymour Hoffman - Rusty

“I am a professional transvestite, so I can run about in heels and not fall over.”
Eddie Izzard - Himself