“- Sage: You know, you have a real anger problem.
- Elle Reid: No, no, I don't. I have an asshole problem. When people are assholes, I get angry.”
Julia Garner - Sage
Lily Tomlin - Elle Reid

“Okay, please don’t take this the wrong way, but I’d rather swim butt-naked across the Ganges with a paper cut on my nipple and die a slow agonizing death from a viral infection than work with you.”
Kunal Nayyar - Raj Koothrappali

“- Tony Manero: You know, you and I got the same last initial.
- Stephanie: [sarcastically] Wow. Does that mean when we get married I won't have to change the monogram on my luggage?”
John Travolta - Tony Manero
Karen Lynn Gorney - Stephanie

“- Fletcher Reede: Hey, creepy. Happy Birthday. How old are you now? 22? 23?
- Max Reede: I'm 5, Dad.
- Fletcher Reede: Okay. [pretends to write] Return the beer keg. Cancel the dancing girls.”
Jim Carrey - Fletcher Reede
Justin Cooper - Max Reede

“- Pvt. Trip: I'm from around Tennessee. I ran away when I was 12 years old and I ain't never looked back.
- Pvt. Jupiter Sharts: What ya doin' since then?
- Pvt. Trip: I run for President. [laughter] I didn't win though.”
Denzel Washington - Pvt. Trip
Jihmi Kennedy - Pvt. Jupiter Sharts