“- Arthur Bach: Want a drink?
- Burt Johnson: I never drink. No one in my family ever drinks.
- Arthur Bach: That's great! You probably never run out of ice your whole life!”
Dudley Moore - Arthur Bach
Stephen Elliott - Burt Johnson

“Folks, my firm's done a tremendous amount of marketing research and we've discovered two critical things; one: most Americans feel that Christmas is a time for family. Two: most Americans feel that in order to stand being around their family, for even one or two days, they need to swill as much alcohol as humanly possible.”
Ben Affleck - Drew Latham

- Lucky Jordan: Don't you know that you shouldn't be drinking at your age?
- Annie ("Ma"): I'd like to be drinking at your age, but time passes.
Alan Ladd - Lucky Jordan
Mabel Paige - Annie ("Ma")

“- Dr. Einstein: I cannot operate without a drink!
- Jonathan Brewster: Pull yourself together, doctor!
- Dr. Einstein: I cannot pull myself together without a drink!”
Peter Lorre - Dr. Einstein
Raymond Massey - Jonathan Brewster

“Drinking don't bother my memory. If it did, I wouldn't drink. I couldn't. You see, I'd forget how good it was, then where'd I be? Start drinking water, again.”
Walter Brennan - Eddie