“I have the money to give you right now, in this moment. I will give you all that I have. Maybe before you were gonna kill me. Maybe. I don't know. I know John, and I love him like he was my own child.”

Philip Baker Hall - Sydney

“- Old Lady: What adorable children.
- Daniel: You want'em? 'Cause I'll sell them to you real cheap.”
David Paymer - Daniel Miller

“All right, son: roll them guns up, count the money, and put your seat belt on.”

Vinnie Jones - Big Chris

“- Samantha Cole: I'm contesting custody.
- Fletcher Reede: What?
- Samantha Cole: If I get sole custody of the kids, that's another 10 grand in child support payments.
- Fletcher Reede: You just won 11 million dollars!”
Jennifer Tilly - Samantha Cole
Jim Carrey - Fletcher Reede

“- Grandpa Gustafson: Relax. Kids swallow quarters all the time.
- Melanie Gustafson: Really?
- Grandpa Gustafson: Sure. If she craps out two dimes and a nickel, then you can start worrying.”
Burgess Meredith - Grandpa Gustafson
Daryl Hannah - Melanie Gustafson