“Three things I love about Germany: my Mercedes-Benz, no speed limit on the autobahn and a black market for anything I can get my hands on.”
Joaquin Phoenix - Ray Elwood

“Spirit. Thank you. Thank you for providing us with the direct-port nitrous... uh... injection, four-core intercoolers, an' ball-bearing turbos, and... um... titanium valve springs. Thank you.”

Chad Lindberg - Jesse

“- Rusty Griswold: Is that a real gun, Mom?
- Ellen Griswold: I don't know, Rusty, but when this is all over, your father... may be going away for a little while.”
Anthony Michael Hall - Rusty Griswold
Beverly D'Angelo - Ellen Griswold

“- Rusty Griswold: Dad wasn't speeding. The cop stopped us because Dad forgot to...
- Ellen Griswold: He was speeding, Rusty!
- Rusty Griswold: No he wasn't, Mom. He...
- Clark Griswold: Rusty! Listen to your mother. I was speeding. I was driving like a maniac. We can all be grateful for this man for stopping us.”
Anthony Michael Hall - Rusty Griswold
Beverly D'Angelo - Ellen Griswold
Chevy Chase - Clark Griswold

“- Motorcycle Cop: Do you know what the penalty for animal cruelty is in this state?
- Clark Griswold: No, sir, I don't.
- Motorcycle Cop: Well... it's probably pretty stiff.”
James Keach - Motorcycle Cop
Chevy Chase - Clark Griswold