“- Huge Turk: I'm troubled with insomnia.
- The Great Man: Oh, insomnia! I know a good cure for it. Get plenty of sleep.”
Jack "Tiny" Lipson - Huge Turk
W.C. Fields - The Great Man

“It's only in going uphill that you realize you're headed downhill.”
William Hurt - George Gulden

“- Dinger: Why did you join the Army?
- Andy McNab: To keep out of trouble.
- Dinger: So your thought if you joined up they'd be no more trouble?
- Andy McNab: Best thing I ever did. Never been in trouble since.”
Steve Nicolson - Dinger
Sean Bean - Andy McNab

“- Charles Van Doren: I'm just trying to imagine what Kant would make of this.
- Albert Freedman: I don't think he'd have a problem with it.”
Ralph Fiennes - Charles Van Doren
Hank Azaria - Albert Freedman

“- Fred Ritter: Benny? You're leaving me with my back to the wall here. I mean, we gotta come up with something!
- Ben Jahveri: It is not possible. We are the type of people who have everything in our favor going against us.”
Michael McKean - Fred Ritter
Fisher Stevens - Ben Jahveri