“I guess there's no such thing as safe sex with a werewolf.”
Judy Greer - Joanie

“- Brad Kimble: I'm short of money. Um. Uh. Ok. Have you ever had this dream in life?... And these things, these stupid, stupid things could make all your dreams come true? That's what it's like with Brooke. Haven't you ever felt that way?
- Cashier: $4.75.
- Brad Kimble: Damn it!”

Will Friedle - Brad Kimble
Kathy Griffin - Cashier

“- Matuzak: Damn it, Ricky, I catch you fucking this machine again, I'll break your neck.
- Ricky: Sorry, chief.
- Walker: Looks like safe sex to me.”

Bruce McGill - Matuzak
Scott Bellis - Ricky
Jean-Claude Van Damme - Walker

“- Stacy: This is a miracle! For once it's all up to him. No tubes, no jellies, no furtive trips to the bathroom... I can just sit back and let it happen. I don't have to do anything.
- Nick: I'm not too good with these things. Can you give me a hand putting it on?”

Lea Thompson - Stacy
Stephen Shellen - Nick

“- Elaine: What on earth have you got in that foolish-looking little bag?
- George: My raincoat and rubbers.”
Mercedes Ruehl - Elaine
Gene Wilder - George