“- Alex: You remember Lara?
- Jeff: Yes I do, and she already has a cold sore. What a surprise.”
Allen Covert - Alex
Nick Swardson - Jeff

“That's a pretty stupid thing to do during Flu season!”

Macaulay Culkin - Miles Russell

“- Jessica Olsson: If she's so nice go and make out with her.
- Elin Olsson: Okay, what do I get if I do?
- Jessica Olsson: If you do what?
- Elin Olsson: If I make out with her.
- Jessica Olsson: You'll get AIDS, probably.”
Erica Carlson - Jessica Olsson
Alexandra Dahlström - Elin Olsson

“- Cry-Baby: Kiss me! Kiss me hard.
- Allison Vernon-Williams: I've never given a French kiss before.
- Cry-Baby: Watch, it's easy. You just open your mouth, and I open mine, and we wiggle our tongues together. And it feels real sexy.
- Allison Vernon-Williams: I won't get mononucleosis, will I?”
Johnny Depp - Cry-Baby
Amy Locane - Allison Vernon-Williams

“It is not going well! This is what comes of telling the truth, or even part of it. You know, getting what you deserve is totally unfair.”
Julia Roberts - Julianne Potter