- Maria Portokalos: Toula, on my wedding night, my mother, she said to me, "Greek women, we may be lambs in the kitchen, but we are tigers in the bedroom."
- Toula Portokalos: Eww. Please let that be the end of your speech.
Lainie Kazan - Maria Portokalos
Nia Vardalos - Toula Portokalos

“When I was growing up, I knew I was different. The other girls were blonde and delicate, and I was a swarthy six-year-old with sideburns.”
Nia Vardalos - Toula Portokalos

“There are two kinds of people - Greeks, and everyone else who wish they were Greek.”
Michael Constantine - Gus Portokalos

I had to go to Greek school, where I learned valuable lessons such as, "If Nick has one goat and Maria has nine, how soon will they marry?"
Nia Vardalos - Toula Portokalos

You know, the root of the word Miller is a Greek word. Miller come from the Greek word "milo," which is mean "apple," so there you go. As many of you know, our name, Portokalos, is come from the Greek word "portokali," which mean "orange." So, okay? Here tonight, we have, ah, apple and orange. We all different, but in the end, we all fruit.
Michael Constantine - Gus Portokalos