“- Tod Newton: When a lady says she isn't thirsty, she means all she can drink is champagne cocktails.
- Janie Barlow: You ought to write a book about what women want.”
Franchot Tone - Tod Newton
Joan Crawford - Janie Barlow

“- Susan Johnson: A real woman could stop you from drinking.
- Arthur Bach: It'd have to be a real big woman.”
Jill Eikenberry - Susan Johnson
Dudley Moore - Arthur Bach

“Now why don't you just take it easy, Group Captain, and please make me a drink of grain alcohol and rainwater, and help yourself to whatever you'd like.”
Sterling Hayden - Brig. Gen. Jack D. Ripper

“A wedding is a sacrament... a joyous celebration of love and commitment. In utopia. In the real world... it's an excuse to drink excessively and say things you shouldn't say.”
Dermot Mulroney - Nick Mercer

“- Bartender: You've had enough for one afternoon, buddy.
- Bob Morales: Put it back on! That dude's my brother!
- Bartender: Yeah and I'm your Irish uncle, leave it off!”

John Quade - Bartender
Esai Morales - Bob Morales