“- Professor Philip Brainard: Why are you here?
- Wilson Croft: To be honest, I'm here this weekend to steal your fiancée. And make her my wife.
- Professor Philip Brainard: I think you'll be sadly disappointed.”
Robin Williams - Professor Philip Brainard
Christopher McDonald - Wilson Croft

“A very clear motive. One of the oldest motives in criminal history. Jealousy. Why, you may find it preposterous to believe that a man of his years and timid character could become so enamored with a young woman as to commit an act of violence to dispose of a handsome and vigorous rival.”

George Coulouris - Prosecutor

“No one that you ever knew, or loved, or who loved you, or anyone who was ever anything to you that made you think that they might be as real as you are, ever proved that all six billion of the rest of us aren't all in it together against you.”
Seth Green - Douglas

“- Michelle: Mike and I had such a connection. The first time that we had sex, it was so beautiful I cried.
- Jeannie: You cried?
- Michelle: Yeah.
- Andie: You mean one glistening tear on your cheek, right?
- Michelle: No, I was really emotional. I even told him that I loved him.
- Andie: After how many days?
- Michelle: Five... two.”
Kathryn Hahn - Michelle Rueben
Annie Parisse - Jeannie
Kate Hudson - Andie

“- Louis: [Louis and Sabrina are kissing] I'm in Paris but you are somewhere else.
- Sabrina Fairchild: I'm sorry, Louis... I shouldn't have done this.
- Louis: I would like to help. But what you have to fix, you won't fix it in bed. You have to fix it here.”

Patrick Bruel - Louis
Julia Ormond - Sabrina Fairchild