“- Dick Kelly: We have a long standing bet: who's the better golfer. Obviously I've got the bigger three wood.
- Lenore: Good. Maybe you can use it to hit your balls right into my vagina.
- Jason Kelly: Holy shit.”
Robert De Niro - Dick Kelly
Aubrey Plaza - Lenore
Zac Efron - Jason Kelly

“Angel Vs. Farris. Who ever loses there virginity first wins!”
Krista Errickson - Cinder

“- Kim Wheeler: I'm just taking an interest in your Iife, as your stepmom.
- Dorothy Wheeler: When you're oId enough to rent a car, we can discuss your roIe as my stepmother. In the meantime, don't taIk about my sex Iife.
- Kim Wheeler: You? Have a sex life?
- Dorothy Wheeler: I do. But I don't charge by the hour Iike you.”
Benita Ha - Kim Wheeler
Jessica Capshaw - Dorothy Wheeler

“- Arthur Bach: [soliciting a prostitute] What I had in mind was spending the night with a stranger who loves me.
- Gloria: Gonna cost you a hundred bucks.
- Arthur Bach: Oh, yeah? What time do you get off?
[bursts out laughing]
- Arthur Bach: Oh, that's funny!”
Dudley Moore - Arthur Bach
Anne De Salvo - Gloria

“- Debbie Thompson: Are there gonna be girls at the party?
- Rick Gassko: No... it's a 'stag' party, and that means that the 'does' stay home!
- Debbie Thompson: I'm not talking about the 'does'. I'm talking about hookers.”
Tawny Kitaen - Debbie Thompson
Tom Hanks - Rick Gassko