“You know, Cliffie, the hottest nights are the ones where you don't know who you are coming home with. Here we are, we don't even know who we are going out with!”
Cynthia Gibb - Cece

“- Dr. Von Zimmer: Has there been some recent change in living arrangements?
- Barbara Whiteman: We have a houseguest.
- Dr. Von Zimmer: Oh. How long are you staying?
- Dave Whiteman: He's staying as long as he likes. And if the doggy doesn't like it, then the doggy can find other living arrangements.”

Donald F. Muhich - Dr. Von Zimmer
Bette Midler - Barbara Whiteman

“- Cynthia: God they totally threw me. They were such assholes.
- Lisa Reisert: Cynthia, there are no guests who are assholes. Only guests with special needs.”
Jayma Mays - Cynthia
Rachel McAdams - Lisa Reisert

“- Briseis: Am I still your captive?
- Achilles: You're my guest.
- Briseis: Guests can leave whenever they want.”
Rose Byrne - Briseis
Brad Pitt - Achilles

“When I'm a guest in another man's house, I don't reach into his refrigerator without asking permission.”
The Rock - Beck