“- Dinger: Did you know that Saddam Hussein is an anagram of 'He's a sad nudist'?
- Andy McNab: Where did the 'M' go?
- Dinger: I swapped it for a 'T'.
- Andy McNab: You can't do that.
- Dinger: Well I just did.
- Andy McNab: That's not right.”
Steve Nicolson - Dinger
Sean Bean - Andy McNab

“- Marquis Robert de la Cheyniest: Corneille! Put an end to this farce!
- Corneille, le majordome: Which one, Your Lordship?”
Marcel Dalio - Marquis Robert de la Cheyniest
Eddy Debray - Corneille, le majordome

“- Clifford Muckle - Boy in Bank: Mommy, doesn't that man have a funny nose?
- Mrs. Muckle - Mother in Bank: You mustn't make fun of the gentleman, Clifford. You'd like to have a nose like that full of nickels, wouldn't you?”

Bobby Larson - Clifford Muckle - Boy in Bank
Jan Duggan - Mrs. Muckle - Mother in Bank

- Michael "Mike" Ward: What's the use of talking to you? You think everything's a joke.
- Martin: It is. If it weren't, life wouldn't be worth living.
John McGuire - Michael "Mike" Ward
Cliff Clark - Martin

“You all oughta be ashamed of yourselves. A bunch of big guys like you, picking on a poor little orphan like him.”

Edward Brophy - Timothy Q. Mouse