“- Timms: I don't always understand poetry!
- Hector: You don't always understand it? Timms, I never understand it. But learn it now, know it now and you will understand it... whenever.”
James Corden - Timms
Richard Griffiths - Hector

“- Kate Veatch: I'm fine. I just threw up in my mouth a little bit.
- White Goodman: In some cultures, they only eat vomit. I never been there, but I read about it... in a book.”
Christine Taylor - Kate Veatch
Ben Stiller - White Goodman

“- Ted: Japan? What's she doing in Japan?
- Healy: Well, you've heard of mail-order brides? Well, they go that way too.
- Ted: What, are they desperate? She's a whale!
- Healy: You can't forget, it's a sumo culture, Ted. They pay by the pound over there. Sorta like, um, tuna.”
Ben Stiller - Ted
Matt Dillon - Healy

“- Somerset: [to the library guards] Gentlemen, gentlemen... I'll never understand. All these books, a world of knowledge at your fingertips. What do you do? You play poker all night.
- Second Guard at the Library: Hey! We've got culture! We've got culture comin' out our ass!”
Morgan Freeman - Somerset
Bob Collins - Second Guard at the Library

“You Samoans are all the same. You have no faith in the essential decency of the white man's culture.”
Johnny Depp - Raoul Duke