“- Todd: You know, this cake tastes kind of funny.
- John: Oh yeah, I dumped a fat sack of Reefer into the mix. I thought I'd spice up the batch.
- Beefy: Really?
- Nicky: What's Reefer?
- Beefy: About five Hundred bucks an ounce.”
Allen Covert - Todd
Jonathan Loughran - John
Robert Smigel - Beefy
Adam Sandler - Nicky

“- Kevin Sandusky - Hot LZ: Hey Jeff what are you doin?
- Jeff Portnoy - Hot LZ: Fuckin' nothing, man. I'm eating jelly beans.
- Kevin Sandusky - Hot LZ: Whoa jelly beans can I have...
- Jeff Portnoy - Hot LZ: No you can't have any fuckin' jelly beans! You think you're the only one who gets sick when he doesn't get his jelly beans? Boundaries man...”

Jay Baruchel - Kevin Sandusky - Hot LZ
Jack Black - Jeff Portnoy - Hot LZ

“The night's as hot as hell. It's a lousy room in a lousy part of a lousy town.”
Mickey Rourke - Marv

“Books can be good for something other than burning.”

Sheila McCarthy - Judith

“- Sam Hall: What are you doing?
- Laura Chapman: I'm using my body heat to warm you. If we let the blood from your arms and legs rush back to your heart too quickly, your heart could fail.
- Sam Hall: Where did you learn that?
- Laura Chapman: Some of us were actually paying attention in health class.”

Jake Gyllenhaal - Sam Hall
Emmy Rossum - Laura Chapman