“- Augustus 'Gus' McCrae: Is that all you boys can think about; gettin' to Ogallala and spendin' your money on whores?
- Jasper Fant: That's all right for you, Gus; you got Lorena with you. What about the rest of us?
- Augustus 'Gus' McCrae: What's good for me might not be good for the weak minded.”
Robert Duvall - Augustus 'Gus' McCrae
Barry Tubb - Jasper Fant

“- Carol Brander:You have her picture on her wall?
- Chris Brander: Yeah. I slapped the ham to it like an hourago!
- Carol Brander: What ham did you slap? Not the one I just bought?”
Julie Hagerty - Carol Brander
Ryan Reynolds - Chris Brander

“Don't screw up the best thing in your life just because you're a little unsure about who you are.”
Jeremy Piven - Arnie

“A dirty mind is a terrible thing to waste.”
Shirley MacLaine - Ouiser Boudreaux

“- Fisherman #3: What are you boys trying to pull?
- J.J. McClure: There's been a nuclear meltdown and we're transporting some contaminated materials to Connecticut.
- Fisherman #3: Well, why Connecticut?
- J.J. McClure: They ran out.”
Louis Nye - Fisherman #3
Burt Reynolds - J.J. McClure