“- Debbie Thompson: Are there gonna be girls at the party?
- Rick Gassko: No... it's a 'stag' party, and that means that the 'does' stay home!
- Debbie Thompson: I'm not talking about the 'does'. I'm talking about hookers.”
Tawny Kitaen - Debbie Thompson
Tom Hanks - Rick Gassko

“- James 'Droz' Andrews: Are we having a party tonight or what?
- Cecilia: Well, there's no publicity, so there's no people; Gutter never showed up, so there's no beer; instruments just blew out, so there's no band; and I think Raji and Deege may be dead.
- James 'Droz' Andrews: Wait a minute... no beer?”
Jeremy Piven - James 'Droz' Andrews
Gale Mayron - Cecilia

“- Guy Cipriani: No wedding!
- Connie Cipriani: We got 300 people coming here.
- Guy Cipriani: Good, they come here, they eat, they drink, they sing, they go the fuck home! Sorry!”
Paul Sorvino - Guy Cipriani
Veronica Cartwright - Connie Cipriani

“Fabulous party. You know, I haven't seen this much love in a room since Narcissus discovered himself.”
Paul Shaffer - Hermes; the Messenger God

“- Zeus: Aw, Hades, don't be such a stiff. Join the celebration.
- Hades: Love to, babe. But unlike you gods lounging about up here, I regretfully have a full-time job that you, by the way, so charitably bestowed on me, Zeus. So, can't. Love to, but can't.”

Rip Torn - Zeus
James Woods - Hades