“Climb the Eiffel Tower with a high-powered rifle. A few years ago, that would've caused a stir. Well... Let the good times roll!”

Linden Ashby - Chase

“Boy, back in the day, we didn't need guns. All we needed was our bare knuckles.”
Samuel L. Jackson - John Shaft

“You have inherited the fortune of the Frankensteins, I trust you will not inherit their fate.”

Basil Rathbone - Baron Wolf von Frankenstein

“- Vince McCain: What about a small advance on my inheritance?
- Rod McCain: What inheritance?
- Vince McCain: I'm your son! You have to leave me something.
- Rod McCain: Why?
- Vince McCain: 'Cause you screwed up my whole childhood!
- Rod McCain: How could I have? I wasn't even there.”

Kevin Kline - Vince McCain
Kevin Kline - Rod McCain

“Now, on the day I end it all, I'd like to leave Margaret the bearded lady my rhinestone collar and my wet-dry shaver. I'd like to leave Jack the midget nothing. It's too late for you, Jack. You're a short... hey, get out of there! You're in my landing space!”

Albert Brooks - Jacob the Tiger