“- Walt Tenor: What's a three-letter word for man's best friend?
- April Mercedes: Tit?”
Greg Kinnear - Walt Tenor
Eva Mendes - April Mercedes

“- Valerie Jean Solanas: Give me fifteen cents, and I'll give you a dirtyword.
- Maurice Girodias: What's the word?
- Valerie Jean Solanas: Men.”
Lili Taylor - Valerie Jean Solanas
Lothaire Bluteau - Maurice Girodias

“Come on. Let's pay our respects to the grieving widow before she falls flat on her face, drunk.”
Sir Sean Connery - Jessie

“My psychiatrist says I suffer from the halo effect, the tendency of widows to idealize their dead husbands. He says it keeps me from falling in love again. He has a point, but I can't imagine I'll ever stop loving Louie.”
Cybill Lynne Shepherd - Corinne Jeffries

“- Lou Peckinpaugh: Your husband's dead a little over an hour and you're already dressed in black? How long you had that outfit waiting in the closet?
- Georgia Merkle: You're wrong. I just bought it. There's an all-night widow shop at Fifth and Geary.”
Peter Falk - Lou Peckinpaugh
Marsha Mason - Georgia Merkle