“- Walt Tenor: What's a three-letter word for man's best friend?
- April Mercedes: Tit?”
Greg Kinnear - Walt Tenor
Eva Mendes - April Mercedes

“- Valerie Jean Solanas: Give me fifteen cents, and I'll give you a dirty word.
- Maurice Girodias: What's the word?
- Valerie Jean Solanas: Men.”
Lili Taylor - Valerie Jean Solanas
Lothaire Bluteau - Maurice Girodias

“- Henry Lowndes: If you call her a widow, that proves that even you thought you were dead.
- Bill Cardew: I'll show you how dead I am.”

Melvyn Douglas - Henry Lowndes
Fred MacMurray - Bill Cardew

“The cities are full of women, middle-aged widows. Husbands, dead husbands who've spent their lives making fortunes, working and working. And then they die and leave their money to their wives, their silly wives.”
Joseph Cotten - Charlie Oakley

“Are they human or are they fat, wheezing animals, hmm? And what happens to animals when they get too fat and too old?”

Joseph Cotten - Charlie Oakley