“I feel so lesbian now.”

Rob Schneider - Jessica

“A reformed drunk, on her knees at church begging, you know, Jesus, Mary and Joseph, and every goddamn saint in Heaven to forgive her for giving birth to Cruella De Fag, you know.”

Philip Seymour Hoffman - Rusty

“- Honey Whitlock: Rodney, why do you have to hurt me? Gay men are supposed to be gentle!
- Rodney: That's just it, Honey, I'm not gay. I'm straight and I fucking hate it! Petey loves me and I can't love him back. I tried. I kiss him, and all I feel is whiskers. I can't take that certain thickness in his pants. I'm ashamed of my heterosexuality!”
Melanie Griffith - Honey Whitlock
Jack Noseworthy - Rodney

“AIDS. Homosexual. Gay. Lesbian. You think these are names that tell you who a person sleeps with, but they don't tell you that.”

Al Pacino - Roy Cohn

“- Tina Kalb: Do you worry about the risk factor involved in gay sex?
- Paul Harmon: It may be news to you, but not every gay man has anal sex. That's where a lot of the HIV risk lies.”
Téa Leoni - Tina Kalb
Richard Jenkins - Paul Harmon