“- Lois Einhorn: Listen, Pet Dick. How would you like me to make your life a living hell?
- Ace Ventura: Well, I am not really ready for a relationship now, Lois. But thank you for asking.”
Sean Young - Lois Einhorn
Jim Carrey - Ace Ventura

“You've just ruined Rose's chance to get married, that's all. That was Warren Sheffield calling long-distance to propose.”

Judy Garland - Esther Smith

“- Vince McCain: What about a small advance on my inheritance?
- Rod McCain: What inheritance?
- Vince McCain: I'm your son! You have to leave me something.
- Rod McCain: Why?
- Vince McCain: 'Cause you screwed up my whole childhood!
- Rod McCain: How could I have? I wasn't even there.”

Kevin Kline - Vince McCain
Kevin Kline - Rod McCain

“The quickest way to ruin a relationship with someone is to actually try to have a relationship with them.”
Mandy Moore - Halley Martin

“I don't care if you ruined my life. I love you!”
Miriam Flynn - Cousin Catherine