“The Ladies Man” quotes

(2000)
Movie The Ladies Man
Title The Ladies Man
Year 2000
Director Reginald Hudlin
Genre Comedy
Plot – Leon Phelps is a very popular DJ in Chicago. During his show he gives love advices due to his huge success with women, but one day he and his producer Julie get fired. While he looks for new opportunities, Leon receives an anonymous letter from a woman who asks him to come back to her. Leon decides to search for her, but the mission is more difficult than expected, due to the presence of many husbands determined to take a good revenge on him.
All actors – Tim Meadows, Karyn Parsons, Billy Dee Williams, John Witherspoon, Jill Talley, Lee Evans, Will Ferrell, Sofia Milos, Eugene Levy, David Huband, Jammer, Ken Hudson Campbell
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  • “You see what you gotta do is you gotta get your thumb up in there... Actually get two thumbs up there and you an be like the Fonz ya know...Heyyyy!”
    Tim Meadows - Leon Phelps
    [Tag:advice, sex]
  • “What is love? What is this longing in our hearts for togetherness? Is it not the sweetest flower? Does not this flower of love have the fragrant aroma of fine, fine diamonds? Does not the wind love the dirt? Is not love not unlike the unlikely not it is unlikened to? Are you with someone tonight? Do not question your love. Take your lover by the...” (continue)(continue reading)
    Tim Meadows - Leon Phelps
  • “My name is Leon Phelps, and to those of you that are uninitiated, I am an expert in the ways of love. I have made love to many fine ladies from the lowliest bus station skank to the classiest most sophisticated, educated, debutant, high society... bus station skank.”
    Tim Meadows - Leon Phelps
    [Tag:sarcasm, virtue, women]
  • “Yeah, well, you suffer from homo-unerectus. That means your wang is hugeified not by women but by a man.”

    Tim Meadows - Leon Phelps
  • “Mrs. Robinson, are you trying to seduce me?”
    Tim Meadows - Leon Phelps
    [Tag:flirting, love, women]
  • “Well, Lance, you're clearly gay. There's nothing really else to say about that. I think you all know that. And that's cool, but, you know, you were trying to oil me up and that's not really cool.”
    Tim Meadows - Leon Phelps
  • “I would begin with a very classy first line, something like: Excuse me sweet thing... can I buy you a fish sandwich? And then I'd start whisper her three words: Man, I'd like to take a bite outta' your butt.”

    Tim Meadows - Leon Phelps
    [Tag:romance, women]
  • “I brought you some flowers...they look and feel plastic, but they smell real.”
    Tim Meadows - Leon Phelps
  • “- Nun: Have you ever been down the Yellow River?
    - Leon: ...Yea, once in the '80s but I did not enjoy it...”

    Joan Messiah - Nun
    Tim Meadows - Leon Phelps
  • Listen. I don't care what you say. Chlamydia is a soup. It's my opinion. I can have that if I'd like. You don't have to argue. I've seen it on the grocery store shelf. Don't argue with me about it. I don't care if you are a doctor.”
    Tim meadows - Leon Phelps
    [Tag:disease, medicine, sex]
  • Listen, I was wandering. Can I ask you a question? Uh... was your father a meat burgler? Here's why I ask: because it looks like somebody stole two fine hams and shoved them down the back of your dress.”
    Tim Meadows - Leon Phelps
  • “So anyways....Doggie Style...mmmhmmmm yeah, Doggie Style.”

    Tim Meadows - Leon Phelps
    [Tag:sex]
  • “I am going to Bangkok to assume a missionary position.”

    Joan Messiah - Nun
  • “I like to help people. I am like Mother Theresa... but of bonin'.”
    Tim meadows - Leon Phelps
    [Tag:helping, nuns, sex]
  • “Everything will randomly work out.”
    Tim Meadows - Leon Phelps
    [Tag:courage, hope]
  • “Yeah, I know what you mean, yeah! Uh, might I suggest that you try lowering your standards, you know? Because, really, we all would like to date a supermodel, or a fine lady, like, uh, Delta Burke. You know? But, uh, that may not always be possible, and that is why God invented the skank.”

    Tim Meadows - Leon Phelps
    [Tag:beauty, sarcasm, women]
  • “As we in the medical field call it... the ball sack.”

    Tim Meadows - Leon Phelps
    [Tag:manhood, medicine]
  • “If you are a rich lady, and I have boned you...Please meet me at the Nacho Cart. If you are a rich lady, and would like to be boned...Please meet me at the Nacho Cart.”
    Tim Meadows - Leon Phelps
Highlights