“- Coach: Wait a minute, that's the kidnap victim, ain't it? You didn't kill her.
- Wayne: No, coach.
- Coach: I'm real disappointing in you boys.”
“Saving Silverman” quotes(2001)
Plot – Darren Silverman, Wayne Le Fessier and J.D. McNugent are best friends since school days. They belong to a cover band together - the Diamonds in the Rough - and they play the songs of their idol Neil Diamond. One day Darren meets Judith, a cold and schemer psychiatrist, who divides him from his friends. To save him from marrying the wrong girl, first Wayne and JD try to match him with Amanda, one of their high school classmates. Later they even kidnap Judith to make Darren believe she is dead. However, the cunning and the karate skills of Judith stand above the awkward actions of the two friends, until Neil Diamond himself comes to help them out.
All actors – Steve Zahn, Jack Black, Jason Biggs, Amanda Peet, Amanda Detmer, R. Lee Ermey, Neil Diamond, Kyle Gass, Norman Armour, Colin Foo, Christopher Logan, Esme Lambertshow all
“Saving Silverman” Quotes 16 quotes
“- Mother Superior: Damn! Lost another one!
- Nun: Son of a bitch.”
“- Wayne: 'Know what? She's kinda like Mother Teresa.
- J.D.: Yeah, but with way better tits.”
“- Judith: Ok, then. No more sex!
- Darren: What?
- Judith: You're not allowed to go down on me for a month!
[Darren is about to speak, but Judith cuts him off]
- Judith: Don't make me take away your masturbation privileges!”
“- Wayne: She didn't like the way his ass looked, so she made him get butt cheek implants.
- J.D.: I thought his ass looked tighter!”
“- J.D.: I'm a mime! I'm a mime! Ha ha ha!
- Wayne: Dude, mimes don't talk.
- J.D.: They do when they're off duty.”
“- Coach: What is it that I always said?
- J.D., Wayne: If you can dream it, you can do it.”
“- J.D.: Well, you didn't know a lot of things. You didn't know I was gay.
- Wayne: Is there anything else you wanna tell me?
- J.D.: I got three balls.
- Wayne: Shut up! God!”
“- Wayne: I'm in a related field.
- Judith: Really? What is it?
- Wayne: Pest and rodent removal.
- Judith: How is that related?
- Wayne: We both help people.”
“Remember, boys! Stay away from women! All they want from you is your man-juice! If you ever get the kind of urges that cannot be supressed by hard liquor, then use this!
[shows his right hand]”
“- Judith: Have you ever fantasized about having sex with any man, any man at all?
- J.D.: Does that include celebrities?”
“- Coach: You ate her?
- Wayne: Yeah, we ate her.
- J.D.: Alive.
- Coach: My hat goes off to you. You boys are smart; that's the perfect crime.”
“Hey, I brought you some more videos. You've got your choice: pornos or monster trucks. Oh, and I got one that's both.”