“Caddyshack” quotes

Movie Caddyshack
Harold Ramis directed this movie in 1980
Title Caddyshack
Year 1980
Director Harold Ramis
Genre Comedy, Sport
All actors – Chevy Chase, Rodney Dangerfield, Ted Knight, Michael O'Keefe, Bill Murray, Sarah Holcomb, Scott Colomby, Cindy Morgan, Dan Resin, Henry Wilcoxon, Elaine Aiken, Albert Salmi
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  • “- Carl Spackler: I'd keep playing. I don't think the heavy stuff's gonna come down for quite awhile.
    - The Bishop: You're right. Anyway, the Good Lord would never disrupt the best game of my life.
    [a thunder strikes]”

    Bill Murray - Carl Spackler
    Henry Wilcoxon - The Bishop
    [Tag:god, storm, thunder]
  • “- Ty Webb: I don't play golf, for money, against people.
    - Al Czervik: What are you, religious or something?
    - Ty Webb: You might say that.”

    Chevy Chase - Ty Webb
    Rodney Dangerfield - Al Czervik
    [Tag:money, religion, sport]
  • “- Danny Noonan: I had a couple of burgers and some Cokes for lunch.
    - Pat Noonan: How many Cokes?
    - Danny Noonan: Four or five.
    - Pat Noonan: What are you, a diabetic?
    - Danny Noonan: I don't know!”

    Michael O'Keefe - Danny Noonan
    Ron Frank - Pat Noonan
    [Tag:disease, drinking]
  • “- The Bishop: Excellency, fiddlesticks, my name's Fred and I'm a man, same as you.
    - Judge Elihu Smails: You're not a man, you're a bishop, for God's sakes.
    - The Bishop: There is no God...”

    Henry Wilcoxon - The Bishop
    Ted Knight - Judge Elihu Smails
    [Tag:clergymen, god, men]
  • The Zen philosopher, Basho, once wrote, "a flute with no holes, is not a flute. A donut with no hole, is a Danish". He was a funny guy.
    Chevy Chase - Ty Webb
  • “- Sandy McFiddish: I want you to kill every gopher on the course!
    - Carl Spackler: Check me if I'm wrong Sandy, but if I kill all the golfers, they're gonna lock me up and throw away the key...
    - Sandy McFiddish: Gophers, ya great git! Not golfers! The little brown furry rodents!
    - Carl Spackler: We can do that... we don't even have to have a...” (continue)
    (continue reading)
    Thomas A. Carlin - Sandy McFiddish
    Bill Murray - Carl Spackler
  • In the immortal words of Jean Paul Sartre, "au revoir, gopher".

    Bill Murray - Carl Spackler
    [Tag:killing, words]
  • “- Ty Webb: You take drugs, Danny?
    - Danny Noonan: Everyday.
    - Ty Webb: Good.”

    Chevy Chase - Ty Webb
    Michael O'Keefe - Danny Noonan
  • “- Spaulding Smails: I want a hamburger. No, cheeseburger. I want a hot dog. I want a milkshake. I want potato salad...
    - Judge Elihu Smails: You'll get nothing, and like it!”

    John F. Barmon Jr. - Spaulding Smails
    Ted Knight - Judge Elihu Smails
    [Tag:denial, food]
  • “- Judge Elihu Smails: Say, Fred, did you hear the one about the Jew, the Catholic, and the colored boy who went to heaven?
    - The Bishop: Yeah, Judge, that's a doozy.”

    Ted Knight - Judge Elihu Smails
    Henry Wilcoxon
    [Tag:amusement, heaven]
  • “He called me a baboon, he thinks I'm his wife.”
    Rodney Dangerfield - Al Czervik
  • “I hear this place is restricted, Wang, so don't tell 'em you're Jewish, okay?”

    Rodney Dangerfield - Al Czervik
    [Tag:jews, secrets]
  • “Ahoy polloi... where did you come from, a scotch ad?”

    John F. Barmon Jr. - Spaulding Smails
  • “This is a hybrid. This is a cross, ah, of Bluegrass, Kentucky Bluegrass, Featherbed Bent, and Northern California Sensemilia. The amazing stuff about this is, that you can play 36 holes on it in the afternoon, take it home and just get stoned to the bejeezus-belt that night on this stuff.”

    Bill Murray - Carl Spackler
  • “- Carl Spackler: Your place got a pool?
    - Ty Webb: We have a pond in the back. We have a pool and a pond... pond'd be good for you.”

    Bill Murray - Carl Spackler
    Chevy Chase - Ty Webb
  • “Oh, this is the worst-looking hat I ever saw. What, when you buy a hat like this I bet you get a free bowl of soup, huh?
    [looks at Judge Smails, who's wearing the same hat]
    Oh, it looks good on you though.”

    Rodney Dangerfield - Al Czervik
    [Tag:clothes, ugliness]
  • “Remember Danny: two wrongs don't make a right, but three rights make a left.”
    Chevy Chase - Ty Webb
  • “- Danny Noonan: I planned to go to law school after I graduated, but it looks like my folks won't have enough money to put me through college.
    - Judge Elihu Smails: Well, the world needs ditch diggers, too.”

    Michael O'Keefe - Danny Noonan
    Ted Knight - Judge Elihu Smails
    [Tag:job, money, university]
  • “- The Bishop: I really enjoy working with young people such as yourself down at our new Lutheran Center... Why don't you drop by sometime, eh?
    - Danny Noonan: I've often thought of entering the Priesthood.
    - The Bishop: Oh, are you a Roman Catholic?
    [Danny Noolan nods]
    - The Bishop: Oh, then I'm sorry, but I'm afraid you can't come.”

    Henry Wilcoxon - The Bishop
    Michael O'Keefe - Danny Noonan
  • “I'm going to give you a little advice. There's a force in the universe that makes things happen. And all you have to do is get in touch with it, stop thinking, let things happen, and be the ball.”

    Chevy Chase - Ty Webb