Kumail Nanjiani quotes
“- Kumail: What's my stance on 9/11? Oh um, anti. It was a tragedy, I mean we lost 19 of our best guys.
- Beth: Huh?
- Kumail: That was a joke, obviously. 9/11 was a terrible tragedy. And it's not funny to joke about it.”
“You can go slow. Allow your dreams and goals to change, but live an intentional life.”
“Nobody really knows what they're doing. Some are just better at pretending like they do.”
“Being a fish out of water is tough, but that's how you evolve.”
“- Stu: He's the second worst guy I've ever met.
- Vic: Who's the first?
- Stu: I'll give you a hint. It's you.”
“- Emily: I feel good about the surgery.
- Kumail: Yeah. Me, too. These doctors know what they're doing.
- Emily: No, they don't. They're just winging it like everybody else.”
“- Nicole: So, how do you know my dad?
- Stu: He kidnapped me. We killed some people.
- Nicole: Huh.”
“Wow... what other racist stereotypes can you do?”
“- Agent H: You've never been in love, have you? I'm not making fun. I'm genuinely asking. You've never once abandoned logic for passion?
- Agent M: Heh. No, I haven't. Passion is unstable, and logic is constant. Yeah. Physical attraction is nothing more than chemical reactions in your brain. Can't trust them. They're not real.
- Agent H: Isn't...” (continue)(continue reading)
- Kumail: Okay, that's a common misconception. Yelling anything at a comedian is considered heckling. Heckling doesn't have to be negative.
- Emily: So, if I... if I yelled out like... "You're amazing in bed", that'd be a heckle?
- Kumail: Yeah. It would be an accurate heckle.
“- Emily: Were you available for rides while we were fucking?
- Kumail: Yeah, but I only looked a couple of times.”