“Forgetting Sarah Marshall” quotes

(2008)
Movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall
Nicholas Stoller directed this movie in 2008
Title Forgetting Sarah Marshall
Year 2008
Director Nicholas Stoller
Genre Drama, Comedy, Romance
Plot – Peter has spent six years of his life idolizing his girlfriend, the television star Sarah Marshall. Now that he's been dumped, he's fleeing to Hawaii. In the hotel, he meets Sarah with her new boyfriend, the rock singer Aldous. He faces the situation drinking many fruit cocktails and meeting a new girl.
All actors – Jason Segel, Kristen Bell, Mila Kunis, Russell Brand, Bill Hader, Liz Cackowski, Maria Thayer, Jack McBrayer, Taylor Wily, Da'Vone McDonald, Steve Landesberg, Jonah Hill, Paul Rudd, Kala Alexander, Kalani Robb, Francesca DelBanco, Branscombe Richmond, Billy Bush, William Baldwin, Jason Bateman, Peter Lewis, Trula M. Marcus, Kirk Fox, June Diane Raphael, Ahna O'Reilly, Tanisha Harper, Carla Gallo, Murray Miller, Cynthia Lamontagne, Max Alexander, Kris Fitzgerald, Brittany Ross, Kaleo, Peter Salett, Gedde Watanabe, Allan Jeff Ho, Chaunnel Salmon, Mervyn Lilo, Philip Matila, Danielle Prem, Tehina-Mai K. Mataele, Agnes Matila, Genny Wilson, Scott Francis Russell, Kristen Wiig, Luis Accinelli, Carla Alapont, Carol Binion, Tim Blaney, Julianne Buescher, Leslie Carrara, BJ Guyer, Sean W. Johnson, Scott Land, Drew Massey, Michael Oosterom, Michelan Sisti, Kevin Carlson, Victor Yerrid, Don Abernathy, Karen-Marie Ali, Max Decker, Massi Furlan, Joy Gohring, Heléna Guenzel, Jean Huynh, Elizabeth Keener, Jordan Kirkwood, Amanda MacLachlan, Albert Miranda, Katharin 'Ladie K' Mraz, Sam Puefua, Kirsten Roeters, Phillip Sanchez, Christopher Simms, E.J. Snyder, Channing Swift, Caroline Timm, Brian Tochi, Maria Zambrana
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  • “- Sarah Marshall: I think that Hawaii is a place to escape for people who can't deal with the real world.
    - Rachel Jansen: Yeah, you know, there's so few personal shoppers and pet therapists. Gosh, it's such a hard life.”

    Kristen Bell - Sarah Marshall
    Mila Kunis - Rachel Jansen
  • “Let me tell you something about these tattoos, okay. That is Buddhist, that is Nordic, that is Hindu, that's just gibberish. They are completely conflicting ideologies, and that does not make you a citizen of the world, it makes you full of shit!”

    Kristen Bell - Sarah Marshall
    [Tag:tattoos]
  • “- Aldous Snow: Maybe you can have Rachel and Sarah, they got along alright at dinner.
    - Peter Bretter: I'm not that kind of guy and even if I was I don't think I have the sexual competency to pull that off.
    - Aldous Snow: Yeah its a gift.”

    Russell Brand - Aldous Snow
    Jason Segel - Peter Bretter
    [Tag:ability, sex, talent]
  • “- Rachel Jansen: Rachel Jansen from the front desk, whats going on up there, we're getting calls about a woman crying hysterically.
    - Peter Bretter: Yeah, y'know, I hear it too, it sounds like she's having a tough time, I think it's coming from the floor above me.
    - Rachel Jansen: You're on the top floor.
    - Peter Bretter: I'll try to keep it down.”

    Mila Kunis - Rachel Jansen
    Jason Segel - Peter Bretter
    [Tag:crying, lies, noise]
  • “- Sarah Marshall: Did you drink today? Because sometimes when you drink...
    - Peter Bretter: Excuse me. No, I haven't had anything to drink today. Maybe the problem is that you broke my heart into a million pieces and so my cock doesn't want to be around you anymore! Okay? Ever! Because you know what I just realized? You're the goddamn devil!”

    Kristen Bell - Sarah Marshall
    Jason Segel - Peter Bretter
    [Tag:problems, sex]
  • “- Peter Bretter: Hi, can I have another Bloody Mary, please?
    - Female Bartender: You're still working on that one.
    - Peter Bretter: It's an anticipatory order.”

    Jason Segel - Peter Bretter
    Cynthia LaMontagne - Female Bartender
  • - Peter Bretter: How are things going with the lady?
    - Darald: Not awesome. She's complicated, like the "Da Vinci Code", except harder to crack.

    Jason Segel - Peter Bretter
    Jack McBrayer - Darald
  • “- Aldous Snow: I found one track that I quite liked. So I checked what it was, and it was actually one of yours, and it kind of reminded me of a dark, gothic Neil Diamond. It's great.
    - Peter Bretter: That's, like, exactly what I'm going for.
    - Aldous Snow: Right, yeah.
    - Peter Bretter: [clearly disappointed] Fuck you're cool! It's so hard to...” (continue)
    (continue reading)
    Russell Brand - Aldous Snow
    Jason Segel - Peter Bretter
    [Tag:hatred, music]
  • “- Chuck: If you get bitten by a shark, you're not just gonna give up surfing, are you?
    - Peter Bretter: Yeah, probably.”

    Paul Rudd - Chuck
    Jason Segel - Peter Bretter
    [Tag:sport]
  • “- Chuck: Chuck's my mainland name, my Hawaiian name's Koodu.
    - Peter Bretter: Oh sorry.
    - Chuck: Its cool, its all good.
    - Peter Bretter: So does Koodu have some cool Hawaiian meaning?
    - Chuck: It means Chuck.”

    Paul Rudd - Chuck
    Jason Segel - Peter Bretter
    [Tag:meaning, name]
  • “Oh God, please take my eyes, but not the shirt!”

    Russell Brand - Aldous Snow
    [Tag:clothes]
  • “- Rachel Jansen: Why Dracula?
    - Peter Bretter: Because he's a man like anyone else. He just wants to be loved. And every time he gets close to a human woman, he ends up smothering and killing her, which is a feeling I am familiar with.”

    Mila Kunis - Rachel Jansen
    Jason Segel - Peter Bretter
    [Tag:killing, love, vampire]
  • “- Chuck: I once saw him beat a guy up with a starfish!
    - Peter Bretter: That's ridiculous.
    - Chuck: That guy was me.”

    Paul Rudd - Chuck
    Jason Segel - Peter Bretter
    [Tag:fighting]
  • “- Matthew the Waiter: Okay, so just one. Here's your wine list, your menu, come on. You want, like, a magazine or something? It's gonna be boring if you're just sitting by yourself.
    - Peter Bretter: No, I'll be alright. Thank you.
    - Matthew the Waiter: I would just be so depressed.”

    Jonah Hill - Matthew the Waiter
    Jason Segel - Peter Bretter
  • “If God was a city planner He would not put a playground next to a sewage system!”
    Jack McBrayer - Darald
    [Tag:god, planning]
  • “I've lost a shoe... have you seen it anywhere? Excuse me, miss, I've lost a shoe... like this one. It's like this one's fellow... it's sort of the exact opposite in fact of that, not an evil version but just, you know, a shoe like this... but for the other foot. Otherwise I'd have two right.”

    Russell Brand - Aldous Snow
    [Tag:clothes, seeking]
  • “Well I would love to sell you some weed, Jeremy, but I'm at my fucking job right now. Obviously, because you called me at work, you know that I'm at my place of work, so I can't just leavehere and sell you some weed. I can sell you some weed when I'm done.”

    Jonah Hill - Matthew the Waiter
    [Tag:drugs, working]
  • “- Sarah Marshall: Aldous... wake up... make love to me.
    - Aldous Snow: Alright, you go on top though, cause I'm knackered.”

    Kristen Bell - Sarah Marshall
    Russell Brand - Aldous Snow
    [Tag:sex]
  • “- Chuck: I don't know, I quit wearing a watch when I moved out here
    - Peter Bretter: That is so cool.
    - Chuck: My cell phone has a clock so I don't need it.
    - Peter Bretter: Oh, so it's basically the same thing.”

    Paul Rudd - Chuck
    Jason Segel - Peter Bretter
    [Tag:telephone, time]
  • “He turned down a blowjob from his ex-girlfriend... mid-blowjob. You know how hard that is for a man? It's called blue balls. He's like Gandhi! But better, he likes puppets!”
    Da'Vone McDonald - Dwayne the Bartender
    [Tag:pain, sex]
  • “- Sarah Marshall: When were you planning on telling me this?
    - Aldous Snow: I just told you, then.
    - Sarah Marshall: Yeah. No, I know. But telling me now isn't really the same as telling me.
    - Aldous Snow: Well, look, you know, I've not told you I've got genital herpes, because it's not inflamed at the moment.”

    Kristen Bell - Sarah Marshall
    Russell Brand - Aldous Snow
  • “I've heard that women do fake orgasms, but I've never seen it... it really, deeply upsets me.”
    Russell Brand - Aldous Snow
    [Tag:acting, orgasm]
  • “- Sarah Marshall: It's a metaphor for addiction to technology.
    - Rachel Jansen: For society, how we're reliant on technology. I get it. I'm with you.
    - Aldous Snow: It's a metaphor for a crap movie.”

    Kristen Bell - Sarah Marshall
    Mila Kunis - Rachel Jansen
    Russell Brand - Aldous Snow
  • “Oh, wedding in Hawaii! Real original!”

    Jason Segel - Peter Bretter
    [Tag:marriage, sarcasm]
  • “- Kemo: I don't cry. I'm not a baby.
    - Peter Bretter: Really? Because you look like a gigantic baby. I'm sorry, I didn't mean that at all.”

    Taylor Wily - Kemo
    Jason Segel - Peter Bretter
Highlights