Paul Rudd quotes
“Wait! I didn't steal anything! I was returning something I stole!”
“We are all just one small adjustment away from making our lives work.”
“We go back, we get the stones before Thanos gets them, Thanos doesn't have the stones! Problem solved!”
“If there's one thing I know, you can't control evil. You can lock it up, burn it, and bury it, and pray that it dies, but it never will. It just... rests awhile. You can lock your doors, and say your prayers, but the evil is out there... waiting. And maybe, just maybe... it's closer than you think!”
“You let somebody move in with you, you make all these little compromises to smooth things along, and the next thing you know, you're on some macrobiotic diet and you're listening to Joni Mitchell.”
“- Cat: All rock stars are older now. Steven Tyler, David Bowie, Mick Jagger...
- Pete: Paul McCartney.
- Ronnie: Okay, stop it. Everybody that you are mentioning looks like an old woman now. You're just mentioning a bunch of Jessica Tandys. Keith Richards gets away with it, but that's because Keith Richards looked 70 when he was 40. And now that...” (continue)(continue reading)
“- Cher: Some people are not lucky enough to be as naturally adorable as you are.
- Josh: Stop it, you're making me blush.”
“- Scott Lang: This is awesome. It's awesome. You know, you guys are breaking down walls, you're healing, it's important.
- [Hank and Hope stare at Scott]
- Scott Lang: I ruined the moment, didn't I?
- Hank Pym: Yes, you did, yes.
- Scott Lang: [Smiles and points at the kitchen] I'm gonna make some tea.”
“- Lisa: Did you ever wish you could delete everything you said as soon as you'd said it? Lately all I do is hear myself being so weak and whiny and needy that I wish I could delete every...
- George: I think the answer to that is to stop talking. Deny a voice to what's falling apart. No lip service. That's my advice to you.”
“- Peter Klaven: I made reservations to play golf on Sunday for the four of us.
- Sydney Fife: No, Pete, I told you, I don't play sports with women.
- Peter Klaven: Look, man, you told my fiancee that she needs to give me blowies in front of my whole family, alright? You owe me.
- Sydney Fife: You make a valid point.”
- Scott Lang: Hi, I'm Scott.
- Hope Van Dyne: [shocked] Did he just say "Hi, I'm Scott"?
“Did you know that cigarettes are a shield against meaningful interaction with people?”
“- Chuck: If you get bitten by a shark, you're not just gonna give up surfing, are you?
- Peter Bretter: Yeah, probably.”
“- Andy: Lindsay, you've got barbecue all over your face, it's pretty foul.
- Lindsay: Come on it's just BBQ sauce... I wanna make out!”
- Ron Burgundy: What cologne you gonna go with? "London Gentleman", or wait. No, no, no. Hold on. "Blackbeard's Delight".
- Brian Fantana: No, she gets a special cologne... it's called "Sex Panther" by Odeon. It's illegal in nine countries... yep, it's made with bits of real panther, so you know it's good.
“You guys have the weirdest goodbye rituals.”
“- Chuck: I once saw him beat a guy up with a starfish!
- Peter Bretter: That's ridiculous.
- Chuck: That guy was me.”