“Friends” Quotes 29 quotes
“If you want to receive e-mails about my upcoming shows, then please give me money so I can buy a computer.”
“- Joey: Oh, I'm sorry. Did I get you?
- Chandler: It's an electric drill! You get me, you kill me!”
“- Monica: Now come on, Chandler, the Miami Vice soundtrack? Really?
- Chandler: They were just giving it away at the mall... In exchange for money.”
“- Phoebe: Why would you kill his fish?
- Chandler: Because, Phoebe, sometimes after you sleep with someone you have to kill a fish.”
“- Phoebe: I'm going to get a coffee. Anybody want anything?
- Monica: I'll have a latte.
- Ross: I'll have a blueberry muffin, with a decaf.
- Chandler: I'll have a bagel with a little...
- Phoebe: You know, I was just being polite.”
“Three failed marriages, two illegitimate children... The personal ad writes itself.”
“Guys can fake it? Unbelievable! The one thing that's ours!”
“- Janice: What a small world!
- Chandler: And yet I never run into Beyonce.”
“- Monica: They say there's been some unusual activity on your account.
- Rachel: But I haven't used my card in weeks.
- Monica: That is the unusual activity.”
“- Monica: We're getting a baby.
- Chandler: We're growing up.
- Monica: We sure are.
- Chandler: So who's going to tell them?
- Monica: Not it.
- Chandler: Not it. Damn it!”
“- Chandler: I realized the only thing that matters is that you, that you make me happier than I ever thought I could be and if you let me I will spend the rest of my life trying to make you feel the same way. Monica, will you marry me?
- Monica: Yes.”
“- Joey: You just want to stay here and wait for Rachel to come back from her date?
- Ross: Yeah. I mean, this guy could be my baby's stepfather.
- Joey: They go out on one date and you worry about her marrying him?”
“I'm not so good with the advice... Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?”
“- Joey: Age?
- Patient: Can't you work that out by my date of birth?
- Joey: I'm a doctor, not a mathematician.”
“- Ross: What are you doing tonight?
- Chandler: Why, do you have a lecture?
- Ross: No.
- Chandler: Free as a bird, what's up?”