Leslie Mann quotes
“- Audrey Griswold-Crandall: What kind of asshole would drive his family cross country?
- Rusty Griswold: Audrey, dad wanted us to be close and that's all I want for my family.
- Stone Crandall: Family is the most important thing there is.”
“- Elaine Warner: He's an asshole.
- Walter P. 'Duff' Duffy: Mmm... casserole.
- Elaine Warner: I said asshole.
- Walter P. 'Duff' Duffy: I heard casserole!”
“- Mike O'Donnell: It's just that I put a lot of work in this yard.
- Scarlet: Did you? Really? Like the barbecue pit? Yeah, the way I remember that is that you spent about an hour working on it and then you spent the next two days complaining about how if you had gone to college then you could have had hired someone else to do it.
- Mike...” (continue)(continue reading)
“They say that when a woman wants to end a relationship, she cuts off all of her hair. I've done that twice in my marriage but am still married.”
“Perfect people are the scariest people to me.”
“Women love hairy men. Cavemen were the sexiest men in history.”
“- Debbie: So you would do sex with me?
- Flirty Hockey Player: 'Do sex'? What are you, Borat?”
“- Linda: Actually, it's the brains I'm more attracted to. I'm not so impressed by fancy feathers.
- Tulio: I know exactly what you mean. My favorite bird is a spotted owl. I've always been mesmerized by those big, round, intelligent eyes.”
“I don't want a turbo penis. I like your medium soft one.”
“- Linda: Wow! You're actually communicating!
- Tulio: Yes! Yes! I introduced myself and shook my tail feathers counter clockwise, thus referring to his dominance.”
“- Sadie: Where do babies come from?
- Debbie: Where do you think they come from?
- Sadie: Well. I think a stork, he umm, he drops it down and then, and then, a hole goes in your body and there's blood everywhere, coming out of your head and then you push your belly button and then your butt falls off and then you hold your butt and you have to...” (continue)(continue reading)
“- Debbie: Sadie might have the chicken pox.
- Jason: I had the chicken pox three times. I have no immunity to it.
- Ben Stone: We don't have the heart to tell him it's herpes.
- Jason: It's not herpes if it's everywhere.”
“- Arthur Stanhope: Beatrice, this is supposed to be her wedding, not yours. I know you're upset, and so am I, but we can't force her to marry someone against her will.
- Beatrice Stanhope: Why not?
- Ursula Stanhope: Mom, dad, I'm ready to go out there and apologize to everybody and tell them what really happened.”
- Ursula Stanhope: Did you just say "love"?
- Beatrice Stanhope: No...
- Ursula Stanhope: You did. You're right.
- Beatrice Stanhope: Ursula... don't say it.
- Ursula Stanhope: I love him! I'm out of here.
- Beatrice Stanhope: Ursula! You can't love him!