News quotes

“It's amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fits the newspaper.”
Jerry Seinfeld

“I've never been shocked by anything on television, except the news.”
Justin Theroux

“I’m a newspaperwoman and I have an obligation to report the facts.”
Phyllis Coates - Lois Lane

“People write negatives things, cause they feel that's what sells. Good news to them, doesn't sell.”
Michael Jackson

“- Ronnie Crawford: Dad! Dad! I've got great news!
- Bernard Crawford: If you two are in love, I don't wanna know about it.”

Lonny Price - Ronnie Crawford
Jim Henson - Kermit the Frog

“- Kate Macer: I was about to have sex with my hitman.
- Alejandro: He wasn't going to kill you... he just wanted to know what you know.”

Emily Blunt - Kate Macer
Benicio del Toro - Alejandro

“- Gloria: You know what could've prevented all this, don't you?
- Charles 'Chuck' Lane: No, what?
- Gloria: Pictures. How could you make up characters if everyone you wrote about had to be photographed?”

Linda Smith - Gloria
Peter Sarsgaard - Charles 'Chuck' Lane

“Do you know what my husband said about the news? He called it the first rough draft of history.”
Meryl Streep - Kay Graham

“How would you feel if you'd been dead a day and a half and someone brought your more bad news?”
Jonathan Banks - Michelette

“- Rich: So, how did your mom react when you told her about the wedding?
- Waverly: It never came up.
- Rich: How come?
- Waverly: She rather get rectal cancer.”
Christopher Rich - Rich
Tamlyn Tomita - Waverly

“- Jo Ann: You're never going to believe what just happened.
- Arturo: If it's bad news, Joanna, I generally believe it.”
Michelle Pfeiffer - Jo Ann
Daniel Zacapa - Arturo

“- The Great Gonzo: Stop the presses!
- Mike Tarkanian: Why? What happened?
- The Great Gonzo: I don't know. I just always wanted to say that.”
Dave Goelz - The Great Gonzo
Jack Warden - Mike Tarkanian

“Ironic. The news will tell them there will be no more secrets. But you and I, we both know that's not true. This world is run on secrets.”

James McAvoy - David Percival

“What is news? It's hard to quantify. Certainly news has changed completely, and the morning shows are not really designed to bring you the news, except to tell you what happened overnight, and the rest of it is a kind of magazine mentality - a little bit of this, a little bit of that. It's harder to be an educated and informed citizen.”
Harrison Ford

“I feel like I'm wasting time if I repeat myself.”
Heath Ledger

“There's no news, boys, so go out there and make some news. Rob a bank, mug an old lady, whatever.”
George Clooney - Fred Friendly

“When I was sixteen, I went to work for a newspaper in Hong Kong. It was a rag, but the editor taught me one important lesson. The key to a great story is not who, or what, or when, but why.”
Jonathan Pryce - Elliot Carver

“- News Reporter: Mr. Vanderhoff, would you care to comment on the rumor that President Roosevelt has been assassinated?
- Vincent Vanderhoff: Guys, how am I supposed to know that? I haven't been upstairs yet. Excuse me.”

Fred Willard - Vincent Vanderhoff

“- Brian Madison: Billy, could you step in here a moment? I have big news.
- Billy Madison: Eric is pregnant?”
Darren McGavin - Brian Madison
Adam Sandler - Billy Madison

“- Mrs. Montenegro: Mr. Peckinpaugh, I think I have some information regarding the untimely death of your late, deceased, murdered partner.
- Lou Peckinpaugh: Who is this?
- Mrs. Montenegro: As the Chinese say, never mind. We must be careful; I'm being watched. Can we meet in your office in fifteen minutes?
- Lou Peckinpaugh: All right. What time...” (continue) (continue reading)
Madeline Kahn - Mrs. Montenegro
Peter Falk - Lou Peckinpaugh

“- Mario: Are you spendin' money on this stuff? Look at this!
- Luigi: Yeah, but that's got the article about the missing Brooklyn girls in it.
- Mario: Yeah? It's also got one on the scientist who turns brains into cheese.”

Bob Hoskins - Mario Mario
John Leguizamo - Luigi Mario

“- Susan: What advice do you have for those trapped in the quarantine zone?
- West: You're basically fucked.”

Carrie Genzel - Susan
Rob Riggle - Frank West

“- Gail Hailstorm: Isn't Cindy Campbell's father a suspect?
- The Sheriff: That is classified information, where did you get this?
- Gail Hailstorm: Sorry, but my information is strictly confidential shit.
[Doofy steps out]
- Doofy: Hi Gail... Gail swallows.”
Cheri Oteri - Gail Hailstorm
Kurt Fuller - The Sheriff
Dave Sheridan - Doofy

“- Shifu: Master! I have... it's very bad news!
- Oogway: Ah, Shifu. There is just news. There is no good or bad.
- Shifu: Master, your vision. Your vision was right! Tai-Lung has broken out of prison! He's on his way!
- Oogway: That is bad news.”
Dustin Hoffman - Shifu
Randall Duk Kim - Oogway

“Every time your friend runs for re-election or conducts a hearing, you drop his name to me until we give him some coverage... but he finally does something that actually might sell some newspapers, you render mute. It's, it's - incongruous!”

Helen Mirren - Cameron Lynne