Elliott Gould quotes
“My greatest fear is to be misunderstood.”
“- Kay Brubaker: You haven't found what you're looking for. You're embarrassed about bothering me again. However, there are one or two questions more you'd like to ask me. It's something personal and you won't bother me any more.
- Robert Caulfield: I haven't found what I'm looking for. I feel embarrassed about bothering you again. However, there...” (continue)(continue reading)
“- Robert Caulfield: Mr Albaine, how much do you charge to dust a field?
- Albain: Twenty five dollars.
- Robert Caulfield: I'd like to hire your plane.
- Albain: That'll be a hundred dollars.
- Robert Caulfield: You said you charged twenty five?
- Albain: Twenty five dollars to dust a field, but you ain't got no field because you ain't no farmer...” (continue)(continue reading)
“- Robert Caulfield: You wouldn't know sincerity if it ran over you.
- Judy Drinkwater: Not if you were driving it.”
“I know more about casino security than any man alive, I invented it, and it cannot be beaten. They got cameras, they got locks, they got watchers, they got timers, they got vaults, they got enough armed personnel to occupy Paris!”
“- Barney Satin: By midnight, they belong to me.
- Max Devlin: Not until the natural end of their lives. That's what you said.
- Barney Satin: Point of fact: I lied. I need them now.
- Max Devlin: Oh, no! Barney, please! I couldn't have done it if I'd known that! He's a great kid. They're all great kids, but that kid, kill him and you kill her!
-...” (continue)(continue reading)
“- Kathleen Smith: Bernie, it's inhuman to do that to a baby kangaroo! It's inhuman!
- Bernie Bonnelli: Has anyone ever told you that you're always repeating yourself? This is no ordinary kangaroo... Junior's different.”
“I find it so easy to get distracted - I try not to do more than one thing at any one time.”
“My problem was I let myself become known before I knew myself.”
“Terry, I can't predict the future. I pay professionals to do that, and even they get it wrong sometimes.”
“- Reuben Tishkoff: Frank come on let me in.
- Turk Malloy: How do you think it feels when you're sitting down on the toilet and someone's banging on the door?
- Reuben Tishkoff: Well, I gotta sit down on the toilet or else I'm gonna shit on your feet.”
“The moment you become embarrassed of who you are, you lose yourself. I changed my house, the way I dressed, the way I ate - for what? For nothing.”
When a reporter tells his assignment editor that he thinks he may be on to something that could be really big, the assignment editor is supposed to say: "You've got forty eight hours, kids, and you better come up with something good or it's going to be your neck!" That's what he's supposed to say, I saw it in a movie.
“- Toby Hart: It's for you, Mom. It's Uncle Max.
- Penny Hart: Uncle Max. I don't believe it. Tell him that I'm, uh... Tell him that I'm not here.
- Toby Hart: She says to say she's not here.
- Max Devlin: Huh? Well, then you tell her it's somebody else. I have to talk to her.
- Toby Hart: He says to say he's someone else.”
“- Max Devlin: I got until midnight, May 15th. That's our deal. Look, I'm... I'm telling you. I'm trying to get these people so hooked on me, they'll sign anything. That takes time. Now, if I go too fast, I'm liable to blow the whole deal!
- Barney Satin: I like your style, Max. You're a devious fellow.”
“- Max Devlin: There's the little old ladies who insists on keeping their pets and the young, married couples who insists on keeping their kids. Not that I've got anything against kids, but some landlords feel it's rough enough taking care of a place these days without them. Thumping and bumping around. And playing handball on your walls at all...” (continue)(continue reading)
“- Reuben Tishkoff: If, God forbid, anything does happen to you, we will not be involved.
- Terry Benedict: You better not be, Reuben. You better not be.”
“- Penny Hart: I love you, Max.
- Max Devlin: How could you possibly love me? I'm not lovable. I'm not even nice. I'm irresponsible. Unreliable. You've said so yourself a million times. Look, even if we try, I'll still probably leave you without any warning. I'm a rotten person.
- Penny Hart: The only trouble with you, Max, is that you have no...” (continue)(continue reading)
“- Max Devlin: Oh my God!
- Barney Satin: I wish you wouldn't say that.
- Max Devlin: I'm sorry!
- Barney Satin: Yeah.”
“She's indestructible. She's an English nanny!”