Charles Grodin quotes
“- Jonathan Mardukas: Come on, cigarettes are killers.
- Jack Walsh: So are women.”
“- George Newton: I don't want to be responsible for 5 dogs!
- Ryce Newton: You don't have to be responsible. Dad, we've been responsible - we've gone through hell with these dogs. And if being responsible means we have to give them up now, then, I hate responsibility. Dad, we kept them alive just like you and mom kept us alive. Ad you're not...” (continue)(continue reading)
“Hi, this is Martin Daniels, I'm not home right now but I got a bomb under city hall. Talk to you later.”
“- Leslie Breitbart: How's my daughter?
- Josh: How's she seem to you?
- Leslie Breitbart: Seems well.
- Josh: So why are you asking me?”
“- Chuck Clarke: What do you do?
- Jim Harrison: I'm with the CIA.
- Chuck Clarke: Interesting work?”
“- Jonathan Mardukas: You ever had lyonnaise potatoes? They are these types of potatoes that are sautéed but then they have this onion thing added to them, and they are really, really delicious. They work well with any, uh, chicken or pork dish. You know I could set you up with lyonnaise potatoes for the rest of your life.
- Jack Walsh: Why don't...” (continue)(continue reading)
“I'm not sick. I just need space.”
“- Warren: My hair doesn't grow long enough to swoop it over. Besides, I think when you see a guy with his hair swooped over, you know he's doing it to cover up something.
-Larry: Yeah, if a guy has a lot of hair, he's not gonna swoop it over.”
“My family likes you more than they like me! Why? All you do is drool and shed and eat!”
“You'd better think of something to name him 'cause when I come home and he's destroyed my house, I wanna know what to call him.”
“- Lady Holiday: Give Stanley a tip, Nicky.
- Nicky Holiday: For complimenting you on your necklace?
- Lady Holiday: No, because it's customary.
- Nicky Holiday: I haven't any change.
- Lady Holiday: Then give him something bigger.
- Nicky Holiday: Bigger? I left my wallet at home.
- Lady Holiday: You left your wallet in college.”
“You know what gets me? I go to get a haircut, they charge me, like, four bucks, which is the same amount of money they would charge anybody to come in. But say a guy like Michael Landon goes into the shop where I go, they would charge him four bucks, yet he's got, like, a hundred times more hair than I do. By rights, they should be charging...” (continue)(continue reading)
“Don't worry about Clifford, he'll be fine if you give him a ton of sugar and a book about Hitler.”
“- Martin Daniels: You tell Sarah that you and I are the best of friends.
- Clifford Daniels: And we are, aren't we?
- Martin Daniels: Shut up.”
“- Nicky Holiday: Miss Piggy... You're a very different looking woman. I'm so tired of the same type, those tall thin creatures with the long legs, the aquiline noses, the teeth like pearls, soft skin...
- Miss Piggy: Yeah, well, I can see where that might make you sick to your stomach.”
“- Larry: What'd you have for lunch?
- Warren: Toast.
- Larry: White?
- Warren: Rye.
- Larry: Good?
- Warren: Yeah.
- Larry: Sounds good.”
“- Fred: What should I do, Ira?
- Governon: What should he do about what?
- Glenda Gardenia Parks: The chicken, Fred is a vegetarian and doesn't know if he should eat it.
- Dist. Atty. Ira J. Parks: Eat the chicken, Fred.”
“- Larry: You know, the guys who always keep their hair are the guys who have no use for it at all, they're not trying to impress anybody.
- Warren: Who's that?
- Larry: Like bums. You ever seen a bald bum? They always have a beautiful head of hair.”
“No matter how many showers I take, I still smell Beethoven all over me.”
“We're goldfish people, we're antfarm people. We're not dog people.”